Venting ♥

I know this might a bit personal and all that jazz but this is my blog and I can do whatever I feel like doing on it.I just needed to vent somewhere about this whole week.... Ugh let me tell, it's been one of the worst weeks of my life. Well let's start off with Monday, I wake up and start getting all this poop from my dad while i'm on my way to school and i'm just getting yelled and getting called names. It's the worst feeling ever. I'm sobbing my eyes out and then I get out of the car, I enter fricking school with puffy eyes. I'm just trying to hide my face, I arrived around 10 mins early. I have photo journalism for my first period and i'm just there sitting in front of my computer area trying not to cry but ugh its so hard when you believe all these horrible about yourself. I cry a lot if you didn't know. Anyways that whole day I was just like blahhh and I kept having little tears coming out. Then Tuesday comes and oh man I wake up again to my dad's bullcrap all the way to school :l its hard enough that I had to hear it yesterday but now I have to hear it again all over. That whole day was the same thing all over again and to make everything worst, Aaron's phone was off so like who did I have?? I literally was so sad and ugh. Then Thursday comes and me and Aaron have this bigo fight. Usually our fights aren't that huge but this one was huge, well to me. I'm not going to go in great detail because my relationship is more of a private thing and no one needs to know. Basically I thought we were going to break up but this time I though it was actually going to happen so I spend about two days straight listening to all the poopy songs.We didn't really talk all that much cause he was told that he'll give me time to think about things, so yeah :l. I'm pretty much the worst girlfriend ever and I know I shouldn't say that about myself but sighs I just feel like most of the problems are caused because of me.I'm learning little by little about myself and about what relationship should be/work. It just takes me so long to finally understand where Aaron is coming from, cause I put myself in his shoes and half of the things I do is pretty shitty. Uhmmm I'm pretty sure if me and Aaron broke up, I wouldn't get over that easily because i've been through so much with him and he knows so much about my life and me so.... It would be very hard but luckily he's still with me and I'm so thankful. I'm just slowing turning into a better person and girlfriend for him and for myself obviously. I actually have learn a lot about myself that I use to deny but now i'm just like wowers that's really me??? ;; 
I know nobunny is going to read this but it was more for myself :3 I basically had a shitty week and I will have a shitty weekend but there's things to look forward in the future so I gotta keep my head up ♥ 
I'm really lucky to have such kind people care about me and that we're trying to cheer me up or could relate to me, everyone has problems and we'll all get through them.
I love you all and I hope you had a good day and a lovely upcoming week! 



2 comments :

  1. You're not alone. The littlest things that my bf says can send me though a whirlwind of emotions. Last weekend he casually brought up some chick's thighs at his school and how hot and juicy and nice she was and my heart just broke. I felt like the ugliest person in the world and it killed me inside. Next thing you know i start seeing flaws in my face, like my nose is so fucked up and my chin looks too weird and my eyes are too small and my eyebrows are so ugly and my teeth are so gross. I finally told him how i truly felt and he's saying "oh yeah the only thing I think about is chemistry and you" and i'm like "bullshit!!! you wouldn't be staring at some chick's ass and thinking about what you could possibly do to them if all you think about is 'chemistry and me'" now the lies are flooding in and i don't know what to do now. It feels like i have to be totally jaw dropping all the time or else i'm not good enough for him. That he'll keep wandering his eyes around and completely forget who I am because he's so lost in someone's booty shorts. I'm crying now this sucks so bad relationships are so overwhelming sometimes but if love really fixes everything it should work out fine, right? I'm making such a big deal out of this and ugh fml. I'm sorry I just dumped my emotions into your blog reading your relationship advice and your own personal emotions made me feel like I could share mine too. idk. i'm creepy for even being here i'm sorry

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    1. Don't worry, I don't think you're making a big deal out of this. I totally understand where you are coming from and from what it sounds like is that your boyfriend sucks :c I'm sorry. Ugh this broke my heart and it makes me so mad because relationships are so overwhelming and when you're so in love with someone/like someone, you get caught up in being with them for how they make you feel. I would advice you to break up with him to be quiet honest but thats just me. Just do what feels right in your heart, but please don't let a boy make you feel like complete shit :c He sounds like someone that is just lying to you so they can make you stay with them but probably behind your back they are planning/or doing something with someone else. I'm 150% sure that you are a lovely,pretty,caring, and nice girl and I believe you can do better! It's gonna be his lost and not yours. Everything takes time and as I said there are things to look forward in the future. Just keep your cute head up. I love you and I totally don't feel it to be creepy ♥ :3 It's nice to know that people are going through a lot and venting about things is great, so if you need someone i'm here!

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